mouflon | [OOC] Inventory (unknownseas)

KEEPING

Summer Outfit - A loose red tank top and cut-off jean shorts, both well-worn.
Shovel - A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to. (x2)
BBQ Sauce - A bottle of… barbeque sauce. Might be cool if you had, like, a barbeque! (x2)
“Social Distancing Device” - A six-foot-long staff, with a pointed blade at the end. Yep, it’s a spear! Has all the powers of a spear, too. Like stabbing.
“Almond Flavoring” - A tightly-sealed vial of some kind of powder with a skull and crossbones on it and a very direct warning label informing the reader that it’s Literally Just Cyanide.
Punk Jeans - A pair of black skinny jeans torn and safety pinned back together so thoroughly, you’re not sure how much of the fabric is left. But hey, they fit!
Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad? (x2)
Diamond - Literally just a raw diamond, about the size of a pea, that looks freshly dug up from somewhere. (x3)
“Personal Space Reminder” - A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts! (x2)
“Letter Opener” - A serrated combat knife that wouldn’t be out of place trying to survive in the wilderness. (x2)
Gemstone - A precious stone with impressive carat weight.
Water Bottle - A bottle of delicious spring water. Refreshing!
Black Keys - A holy sacrament in the form of a long and thin sword, made to be thrown.
“Extra-Large Spice Grinder” - It’s. It’s just a full-on Medieval-style mace.
“Letter Opener (Deluxe)” - A full-on sword with a cool jet-black blade. Comes in a sheath, thankfully.

AVAILABLE

Letter to Noa - A sealed scroll of parchment addressed to one Noa Wyndham. Inside, you find not only normal keeping-up correspondence, but what appears to be part of a story about a brave princess and a dashing, lonely thief. It's... floridly written.
Pet Talking Skull - Though it may be shocking to get what looks like a human skull out of a vending machine, you're probably not prepared for it to be alive. It doesn't talk, but by the disgruntled sound of it's grunts and groans it seems as though it probably hates being alive. Enjoy your new pet!
9999 in 1 Game Device - A handheld device for playing retro games! There’s actually only about twenty, they just repeat in the menu until they reach 9999. Also they all suck.
Trust Exercises and You! - A thorough guide to conducting, coordinating, and adjudicating exercises from the classic trust fall to the more advanced. Be the self-made king of your workplace and transmit all your good vibes with this book from wordsmith and morale expert… the name seems to have been blacked out?
Matryoshka Dolls - A series of intricately painted nesting dolls, meant for display rather than as a toy for children. At the center there’s… a stick of gum?
Non-Descript Golden Man Award - A gold statue of a blank man, sized to be held in one hand! A sign on the bottom says it’s for… Best Grandma? Unfortunately it’s not even made out of gold, it’s just gold-painted bronze.
Chosen’s Orb – A smooth red gem that easily fits in the palm of your hand. If you didn’t know better, you’d almost think it was alive. DESTROYED
Stuffed Kangaroo - About a foot tall, and… it’s a kangaroo, what do you want from me?
Wizard Hat - A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork.
Labcoat - A standard white labcoat, perfect for cosplaying as The Professor’s secret second assistant who lives in the walls. Oops, spoilers! Pretend I didn’t say anything, okay?
Marionette - An intricate and complex puppet that either looks creepy or cool, depending on your point of view.
Nisse - A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Gummy Fish - A ziploc bag of red fish-shaped candy. Actually pretty good, if you like that sort of thing!
Snow Globe - A souvenir from… it looks like Tampa? Perfect to put on a shelf and look at once in a while.
Incredible Soaking Device - A water gun! Surely you will all be very responsible with this.

??? help her

Pokemon (Toxtricity) - A green and black pokeball. Inside is a 5 foot tall purple and yellow lizard-like pokemon. Be careful, even without it’s powers it’s still poisonous!

DISCARDED

Origami Instructions - A book of instructions on how to fold paper into cool things! Unfortunately, it doesn’t actually come with any paper.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Tea Variety Pack - An assortment of different teas, mostly green tea blends. If you find one you like, better hope another one of these drops, because there’s only one of each in here!
Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
Tiger Stripe Suit - A fitted suit and pants in full orange-and-black tiger stripes. Somehow, putting in on makes you feel stealthy, but… that can’t be right, can it?
Bucket of Bricks - A plastic bucket with a lid full of small, colorful, interconnecting blocks. The only limit to what you can build is your imagination! No minifigures included.
Scarf - An incredibly comfortable scarf, if you don’t mind the dull brown color.
Gingerbread House - A whole elegantly designed gingerbread house with all kinds of candy accents.
Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you while trapped at the bottom of the sea, but it refuses to complain…
Air Tank - A tank of air suitable for diving. It would be a great help towards getting out of here… if you had a door, and if it weren’t empty.
“Landscaping Aid” - It’s just a really big rock. Man, if one of you used this to kill someone else here at the bottom of the ocean… that’d be fucked up, huh?
Ten-Gallon Hat - A hat perfect for wearing in a western - or on stage singing country music. Yeehaw!
I Can’t Believe it’s Not Margarine! - A single stick of unsalted butter. Better refrigerate it.
A blanket with two holes - Literally just a white blanket with two eyeholes in it. You'd have to be an idiot to mistake this for a ghost costume, but most of our classmates are idiots…
Wizard Hat - A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork. (x2)
Waterfall Poster - A full-size wall poster with a beautiful photo of Victoria Falls, the largest waterfall in the world. If you’re not into Rita Hayworth, this might be a useful tool to help you break out of here. (x2)
Pin-Up Calendar? - A calendar for the year 2015, featuring lurid pictures of… wait, no, those are just normal janitors in full coveralls standing in exotic locations.
VHS Tape - A blank tape of some kind??? It might not be just the fantasy characters who don’t recognize this. It contains a recording of an instructional program on close-up magic tricks!